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SkyFinch

SkyFinch

The motion blur near my genitals means.....mmm-mmm
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Do you have a problem?

Post it here and I'll do my best to help you out.
It can be anything....love, money problems, body odor.......














please don't take any of my advice seriously.
 
Ice, from now on, I'm going to be serious with my posts. Please don't use this thread to spam. It's for people with problems, and I'm sort of like Dr Phil. I want to help, and I ask nothing in return.
 
D_A said:
my penis is large...and theres not enough women for it
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Have you ever tried going to a farm? Lots of people like riding horses, but I'm sure they'll return the favor.
 
Catp00p said:
My dead dog is trying to talk to me through my dishwasher... can you talk to dead pets too?
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Next time, I recommend spraying the b1tch, and/or son of a b1tch with a hose. But if a dishwasher is the only method you have of cleaning your dog....then by all means...

Anyways, I can definitely talk to dead animals. Your dead pet is saying, (and I quote) "Doggy heaven sucks. All the other dogs have clean bums, so sniffing them isn't all it's "cracked" up to be."
 
Dear Finch just a while ago my nipple's started to hurt so i started fondleing them. I have found hard objects in them? Is it cancer? HELP ME!!
 
Ronald_Mcd said:
Dear Finch just a while ago my nipple's started to hurt so i started fondleing them. I have found hard objects in them? Is it cancer? HELP ME!!
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Early teens can be such a drag:sad:
 
Ronald_Mcd said:
bahh i already know its calcium deposits or some shit like that.
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i remember leaning against a wall or something and feeling this really sharp pain. i felt my nipple and it was all hard. I thought i had breast cancer. They disappear soon i think. i can't really remember how long it took. It was so long ago.

ANYway....

Dear skyfinch,
I went to my girlfriends house last night and her parents offered me dinner. Should i accept even if i had already eaten? Last night i just said no and sat around fiddling with things.... But what should i do next time? this is like, a midlife crisis or something. Damn i'm unhappy. the world hates me! I think i'm gonna go sit in my room and sulk for a few weeks.
 
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Ronald_Mcd said:
Dear Finch just a while ago my nipple's started to hurt so i started fondleing them. I have found hard objects in them? Is it cancer? HELP ME!!
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Nah, it's not cancer. It's a condition simply known as Erectnippleitis. You were probably looking in the mirror when this happened? If so, then it;s really not a problem. Lots of people get hard, erect nipples while looking at themselves all the time. My suggestion....sit back, flick at your nipples a few times, and enjoy the rest of the day.

If it is cancer, you'd better take a blow torch to your chest ASAP.
 
pukka said:
I think i'm gonna go sit in my room and sulk for a few weeks.
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Instead of just sitting, use the advice I gave to Ronald_Mcd. I'm not sure about you, but when I'm feeling down...when I think life has nothing left to offer....or when I just get horny as a mofo, I just sit in my room and start flicking, and even (if I can stretch them far enough) licking them a few times. After a few minutes, every one of my problems seem to go away. Try it. If it doesn't work, then you have some serious problems.
 
Dear Finch
These squirrels keep coming in through my window at night, but my room gets really warmso I must open them. What can I do?
-Anonomous
 
Dear Dr.Finch . i have me some hairy nipples. not on the nipple just around the arios*i can't spell but it's the brown shit * is that normal? also 1 of the hairs is like 4 inch's long and the others are 1 inch. ok on to my next problem. there's this girl i liked for 5 years. last year i told her i liked her and i called her couple times but she was always busy ;( . this year i told her i liked her still and i picked her up a couple times and made out with her *felt her nice ass to* but after 5 days she said we should just be friends. should i try next year to and expect to get 1 step further??? danke in advance
 
Dear Mrs manners,
I was at the pharmacists yesterday when this guy says to me he says, "you smell funny". this got me thinking. Do i smell funny? Is it an unpleasant smell? what were these "Anti-pepsi ants" the pharmacist so desperately tried to give me? it looked like spray-paint or something.
 
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